Dick Johnson's Saturday Six: The Least Inventive Scuttlebutt in All of Sports

When Dick Johnson isn't penetrating deeply into the NFL's most taciturn stories, he is working the phone, talking to sources, and uncovering yet-to-be released stories--the stories Adam Schefter has wet dreams about uncovering. We don't even call them rumors, because we know Dick Johnson is that good. If you wanted to hear it first, you've come to the right place.

Report: Brett Favre Allegedly Farted

In what could be one of the biggest stories of the new millenium, our very own Dick Johnson has received word from an undisclosed source, saying Minnesota Vikings quarterback Brett Favre has allegedly farted.

Dick Johnson's Saturday Six: The Least Inventive Scuttlebutt in All of Sports

When Dick Johnson isn't penetrating deeply into the NFL's most taciturn stories, he is working the phone, talking to sources, and uncovering yet-to-be released stories--the stories Adam Schefter has wet dreams about uncovering. We don't even call them rumors, because we know Dick Johnson is that good. If you wanted to hear it first, you've come to the right place.

Dick Johnson's Deeply Penetrative Reports: Unrest Inside the Browns' Organization

These days NFL teams are becoming more and more secretive. Players respond in cliches and neutralities.  Coaches provide disingenuous injury reports. Members of the media are stonewalled from locker rooms. Peter King doesn't get responses to his text messages. At these times, when even the most in-depth reporting can't uncover the story, Punting on First Down turns to the hardest-hitting, most deeply penetrative investigative journalist in the business. His journalism is so hard-hitting and penetrative, we have to maintain his anonymity for legal reasons. You can call him Dick Johnson. This week, our helmet-wearing reporter takes a deep look inside the disorderly Cleveland Browns.

Sickness. The Latins had a word for it. Morbus. It means sickness or illness. Cleveland Browns owner Randy Lerner recently said that he was 'sick' about the state of the Cleveland Browns. Shortly thereafter, the Browns' now-erstwhile GM George Kokinis was "reportedly" "escorted" out of the building. Of course, none of this was reported by yours truly, Dick Johnson, so the veracity of these so-called "reports," if they can so be called, is suspect. Needless to say, I SUSPECTED something else was going on. So I drove my high tech, batmobile-esque, super car of mysterious secrecy to the scene - Cleveland Municipal Stadium. Here's what I uncovered.

Dick Johnson's Deeply Penetrative Reports: The 5-0 Denver Broncos

These days NFL teams are becoming more and more secretive. Players respond in cliches and neutralities. Coaches provide disingenuous injury reports. Reporters are stonewalled from locker rooms. Peter King doesn't get responses to his text messages. At these times, when even the most in-depth reporting can't uncover the story, Punting on First Down turns to the hardest-hitting, most deeply penetrating investigative journalist in the business--Dick Johnson.

This week: the secret to the Broncos early season success...