Punting on First Down presents a sort of live web log of the NFL action on most Sundays. At least the ones on which I have internet access and I don't have to work. So probably not every week but from time to time. Let's party...
Sunday, November 15, 2009
First Church of Football: A Semi-Live Webbed Logging of the Lord's Sport
Punting on First Down presents a sort of live web log of the NFL action on most Sundays. At least the ones on which I have internet access and I don't have to work. So probably not every week but from time to time. Let's party...
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Here kitty kitty. God damn, you NFL network. If I were a Dolphins fan, I'd be furious about how the Dolphins are only a wildcat team now and nothing else. Jesus.
ReplyDeleteLook a white wide receiver! He must be just like Wes Welker in every way!
ReplyDeleteHmmm... there's an awful lot of punting in this game for these two supposed QB masters. Let's get the TD show on the road for fucksake.
ReplyDeleteAlthough, Punting on First Down is obviously a strong proponent of punting frequently and, often, needlessly.
ReplyDeleteTom Brady was a sixth round pick? My God! I never knew! I certainly haven't heard that said about him 8000 times a day.
ReplyDeleteBrady threw an incomplete pass. Just saying, since nobody seems to think it has ever happened.
ReplyDeleteHa Ha! Ballet! What a zinger from Collinsworth!
ReplyDeleteWhy is Julian Edelman so open all the time? He has terrible, terrible gaaas.
ReplyDeleteLet the ethno-stereotype party begin!
ReplyDeleteI like how in the trailer for ninja assas... assasss... asas... killed a guy cites a critic who called the movie "violent" as if that was self-evidently a good thing. The critic probably said, "This movie is so disgustingly violent, it made me sick to my stomach. Even the moments that weren't drenched in blood and human entrails were awful and unbearable. Don't ever see this pile of excrement."
ReplyDeleteAlso, the Colts corners are trying to sneak up on Edelman from behind to try and steal his Jew gold!
ReplyDelete"My Sharona is blasting in the background, but it was the Patriots who had "the knack" for scoring in the first half..."
ReplyDeleteOh Bob Costas, you've been doing this too long.
Huh? What? Oh, sorry. I must have nodded off for a second. Tony Dungy started talking. And it didn't involve homo-bashing.
ReplyDeleteBut it did involve absolutely no camera presence whatsoever.
ReplyDeleteBobby Costas with the Bengals prison joke! That's what he's paid for, folks.
ReplyDeleteLet's see: the Lions are really bad, the Bengals get in trouble with the law often, and what's with these airplane peanuts? Am I right?
ReplyDeleteTake my wife, please....I tell ya, I get no respect...
ReplyDeleteSebastian Vollmer, starting left tackle, New England Patriots, immigrant. Jesus, no American job is safe anymore!
ReplyDeleteThey need to bring back the "football move" rule. This two step or whatever thing is horse crud. Nothing more hilarious than announcers mulling over a challenge, trying to decide what constitutes a football move.
ReplyDeleteWell, it's obvious that Wes Welker's "football moves" would be much less "hip" and more "square" than say, Randy Moss' ghetto freestylin' moves.
ReplyDeleteEven Collinsworth was shocked, SHOCKED, that Sir Tom of Brady misread a defense! It must be a misprint, good sir!
ReplyDeleteIt's Brady vs. Manning...anything you can do I can do shittier...
ReplyDeletePeyton Manning's throw on the interception? Chris Simms-esque.
ReplyDeleteAh yes. The double pick. That's what you call a momentum killer. And after Bethea stupidly came out of the endzone on the first pick. This kind of shit always happens to the Patriots and they somehow get credit for it.
ReplyDeleteBill Belichick invented football. You didn't know that?
ReplyDeleteI wonder if Sebastian Vollmer is playing tonight. Haven't really heard his name mentioned yet.
ReplyDeleteI can't wait to watch the Today Show tomorrow where Meredith Viera interviews a lady who was attacked by a chimp......Seriously? That qualifies as news? I was bitten by a squirrel once. Can I be on tv?
ReplyDeleteWow. Another impressive turnover. Let's hope these teams just keep driving back and forth and turning the ball over for the rest of the night. That'd be tailgate approved!
ReplyDeleteIf I were Peyton Manning, I would have come up with better audible codes specifically suited to the Patriots. "AIDS! AIDS! I gave Giselle AIDS on 3!" or "Belichick is a cunt! He's a fat stupid cunt! 58 is the mike!"
ReplyDeleteThat was a pretty scrappy run-back by Wes Welker. He should win the Eckstein Award for Scrappiness.
ReplyDeleteOr "Wes Welker almost poetically symbolizes the racism prevalent in the greater Boston area."
ReplyDeleteIf you have a sudden decrease in vision. You probably shouldn't be boning in your medical situation. Please don't take Cialis, for God's sake.
ReplyDeleteI was wondering why there weren't any people of color at that Red Sox game I went to....that term still flies, right? In Boston it did...
ReplyDeleteNinja Assassin < 2012.
ReplyDeleteNinja Killed A Guy also is "gory" according to a critic. It's all like: society, here's a mirror.
ReplyDeleteI believe "negroes" is the politically correct term in Boston.
ReplyDeleteI wish that production company wouldn't have stolen my home movies from my trip to Japan...
ReplyDeleteThis game should be directed by Roland Emmerich. It would most definitely have much more massive walls of water and huge explosions chasing people. That would certainly speed up some of these drives.
ReplyDeletePossibly even some killer ice.
ReplyDeleteBut that would involve TV execs listening, and Roland only takes productions where we didn't, in fact, listen.
ReplyDeleteHello, I'm a PC. And I don't start doing incredibly annoying shit for no reason when you are trying to do something else.
ReplyDeleteBill Belichick inspired his team? No way. He probably just played that Pacino speech from the end of Any Given Sunday again.
ReplyDeleteIf Santa got me a Mercedes, I would believe in him.
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing that won't happen, though, because Santa seems like one of those things that you have to believe in it for it to exist--like God.
ReplyDeleteIf you had a Mercedes, you would probably have a seat reserved on the ark once the world goes to the shitter. You wouldn't even need a Tibetan monk to sneak you in through the hydraulic chamber.
ReplyDeleteManning: "Gator! Gator! Bruschi is a huge pussy! Hike!"
ReplyDeleteAwww sheeeeit. Ain't over yet. The Colts should drive down the field, score a TD, then go for two. Let's make that happen. Go.
ReplyDeleteAl Michaels is "stunned times 5" that the Pats went for it on 4th down. Collinsworth retorted by saying he's "stunned times infinity."
ReplyDeleteThat old guy just stared at that girl's ass on the Fidelity add.
ReplyDeleteSo can we just admit Belichick made a stupid decision? Or is that heresy and banishment to Siberia?
ReplyDeleteIf they get in, they better go for two.
ReplyDeleteI'd say they go for three.
ReplyDeleteThe Brady Face is out in full force.
ReplyDeleteGo for two! Please!
ReplyDeleteDamn it. Lame. Jim Caldwell is a coward, I tell you.
ReplyDeleteTom Brady is so handsome in defeat. Dreamy.
ReplyDeleteHis buttchin needs a new coat of sheen.
ReplyDeleteBill Belichick, still a genius?
ReplyDeleteI believe it. Cause it happened.... I find stuff happening quite believable, in spite of Cris and Al.
ReplyDeleteBut incredulity is a key for any broadcaster. It was actually in the handbook I received when I first got my job with the Nationals. Right in front of the hyperbole chapter.
ReplyDeleteIs Andrea Kraemer wearing a leather zipper-covered purple jacket? Tribute to Michael Jackson perhaps?
ReplyDeleteAnd that must be after the drive the retarded mini stories into the ground chapter.
ReplyDeleteThat was a bad coaching decision by Bill Belichick! What insightful analysis from everyone on the NBC staff! I never would have even thought about that!
ReplyDeleteHere's a preview of Al and Cris' thoughts: Al: "That was a yooooooooge decision by Belichick. You're excited? Feel these nipples." Cris: "Sebastian Vollmer for league MVP, hyuck hyuck. I mean, this guy is good. And I should know. I'm a genius."
ReplyDeleteAlright, that about does it, folks. We bid you adieu.
ReplyDelete