POFD is proud to present the fascinating love stories of Chad Ocho Cinco and Terrell Owens. In the off-season, the two lovers share a one-bedroom studio apartment in a very liberal minded neighborhood. Although they wanted to keep it a secret we have exclusive footage of the amazing adventures that took place. They may be different in many respects, but share one heart for each other. With the love they share they are able to pull through all the wacky shenanigans and missteps that took place in their exciting off-season life together.
This week on Who’s the Wider Receiver- T.O. and Chad are having some financial issues. To keep them afloat they need to think of a way to make some money.
Season 1: Episode 4
Chad 85- “Terrell open the door sweet heart.”
T.O.- “No go away!” (crying)
Chad 85- “Is this about last night because I swear I was just tired.”
T.O.- “No its about the eviction notice that was placed on our door this morning you ass!”
Chad 85- “Shit!”
T.O.- “Yeah that’s right with all your league fines and late night partying we are actually in heavy debt.”
Chad 85- “Don’t worry, we will figure out a way to get through this.”
T.O.- “We?!! No mister I have stood by you and helped out for the last time. This is not a “we” problem. You need to go out and fix this.
Chad 85- “Is this because I never got you that puppy?”
T.O.- “No its because as a young T.O. I always dreamed of living in a huge mansion with my lover. Not sharing a twin mattress with you in this shit hole.”
Chad 85- “If it’s a mansion you want, then I will figure out a way to get it for you.”
T.O.- (Begins to calm down and wipes the tears away) “How are you going to do that?”
Chad 85- “Ok I have an idea! We will pull a Michael Oher.
T.O.- “What is that?”
Chad 85- “Now stay with me on this one. Lets drive around the ghetto looking for the tallest strongest kid we can find and adopt him. Some crazy white lady did it with Michele Orr on the Baltimore Ravens.”
T.O.- “How is that going to help?”
Chad 85- “We train him into becoming the next NFL star. Then when he makes it big we ride off of his pocket book.”
T.O.- “Look at you coming up with such a great 5 year plan. Plus I have always wanted to have a baby with you. I’m in!”
Chad 85- “Yeah you take care of him and I will just sit there drinking beer and looking good.”
T.O. and Chad drove around Martin Luther King Blvd. for two hours. Still they could not find anyone that looked like a good candidate to be their son.
Chad 85- “What about that one?”
T.O.- “No not big enough.”
Chad 85- “That one?”
T.O.- “No, see the coke left under his left nostril. He wont keep motivated on school or sports.”
Chad 85- “Who cares about school. We just need him to make it to the NFL.”
T.O.- “How about that one!?”
The two of them caught site of a couple of boys playing basketball. It was not hard to tell which boy T.O. was talking about. A giant boy/man who was at least 6 foot 10 inches weighing around 275 lbs stood towering over the rest.
Chad 85- “Your right Terrell he is perfect!”
Chad rolled down the window. Cautious about getting out of the car.
Chad 85- “Hey big man! Big Man! What’s your name?”
All the boys stopped playing ball for a minute. Glanced at each other and began to make there way towards the car.
Big Tyrone- “Who’s asking?”
T.O.- “Oh don’t be scared of us. We just want to take you home with us…..”
Before T.O. could go any further the boys began to pull something out of their athletic bags. Chad knew exactly what was about to happen as he stepped on the gas as quickly as possible. Three gun shots fired towards the back of the car breaking the back windshield.
T.O.- “So how did that crazy white lady do it?”
Chad 85- “I have no clue. Maybe that wasn’t such a great idea.”
T.O.- “Yeah did not work in our favor.”
Chad 85- “Your old street corner is not too far from here. How about you go make us money the old way.”
T.O.- “Do I have to?”
Chad 85- “Yes! Like I said you will always be my bottom bitch. Now get out and make me some money woman.”
T.O.- “Yes sir.”
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