Every week, our inbox is figuratively and literally flooded (our computers have bad plumbing) with thousands upon thousands of emails from our countless fans. We feel obligated to answer at least 5 lucky fans' (out of thousands, possibly billions, mind you) emails each week. It is our mailbag, of sorts, except nobody has used actual mail since 1997, so we call it our inbox. Unlike every other mailbag ever, though, it will not be vain and self-serving. So, every Wednesday one of us will sit down with a glass of rye (a lovely chianti, this evening) and show the fans we care by responding with half-assed, wry attempts at humor. Send us your emails and questions at our fancy new email account: puntingonfirstdown@gmail.com.
From reader Cadilass:
What's the deal with the NFC? Deciding the playoff teams already?
Seriously. What a bunch of lame as jerks. The AFC knows about drama. Five teams for two spots is how you party. Non-fantasy championship players might actually care a little about this week. I can't wait for that Chicago-Detroit game!
Email #2
From reader RayLewis:
How deal you feel about Brian Billick as an analyst?
Let's remember that this guy was the man who was supposed to provide the Ravens with an offense. He was a Vikings offensive coordinator before he became the Ravens head coach. Ozzie Newsome then provided him with massive amounts of talent and the best attack he could come up with was basically Trent Dilfer and Jamal Lewis before he died. A half-retarded rugby player could come up with a better football offense. He pretty much translates his coaching prowess in its entirety to his TV analysis. "Emotional steam" pretty much sums it up.
Email #3
From reader dougsnyder:
How many wins do a Shanahan-led Redskins win next year?
A solid 8-9 wins with an immediate playoff loss, if they actually make it to the playoffs. Shanahan is a genius when it comes to building a team that shows flashes of brilliance but inevitably fails once you get to the end of the year (much like his postdecessor). Shanahan is quite the heartbreaker. As soon as you are emotionally involved in the team and excited about them, he coaches them to late season and playoff losses. He's the ultimate tease. He's sort of like the coaching version of The Dark Knight. The build up was so awesome (Batman Begins/hype about movie/hype about Heath Ledger), but then you realize it sucks a lot (a 5 hour movie that somehow couldn't develop its own plot and was completely worthless except for Heath Ledger and that was mostly because he died).
Email #4
From reader PeyPey:
How do you feel about Caldwell benching his starters?
/puts on Broncos jersey
What an ASSHOLE! He ruined the Broncos season! Somebody kill him!
/puts on unbiased football jersey
What an ASSHOLE! I hope he drowns!
/puts on Jets jersey
Woooo! Go Jets! Testeverde for life!
Email #5
From reader Brett Favre:
Who's the biggest Pro Bowl snub?
Probably Brady Quinn. His Charlie Weis pedigree is really paying off. He truly knows how to lead an offense. That 67.2 passer rating smells like a champion.
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